Take time to celebrate your next two accomplishments and victories.
In 25 days, I am standing in front of 30 or 40 or 50 teenagers and talking about swearing. In 25 days, I’ll have three 90 minutes lectures in 6 hours. In 25 days, everything must be ready: I am not good enough to improvise. But I’ll be ready.
I read through my manuscript today. I envisioned myself making them laugh and smile, teaching them stuff and showing them how to play with language. I heard the thundering applause, even a few “encore”. And it felt good.
There is always anxiety before a performance like this, and you are always afraid that something will go wrong. And something always does, usually something you never even thought could go wrong in the first place. I am scared, I am nervous and frightened — and yet I had this feeling of invincibility. This will be one helluva lecture tour.
To celebrate, I had dark chocolate and milk. I sat in the sun on our porch and smiled to our neighbours and my mind started drifting, daydreaming about the tour up north. Way up north, all the way to Nordkapp. And I saw myself running barefoot up there, at the northernmost tip of Norway. And I had another chocolate.
When I picked up my son at kindergarten one hour later, I still had a nice, warm feeling in my stomach. Now, it might have been the chocolate. But I prefer to believe that it was my daydreaming about my future accomplishments.
If my two weeks in Finnmark will be anything like what I envision them to be, I’ll be over the moon for weeks afterwards.